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I saw the Jenna Lewis sex tape. She's the girl from Survivor, in case any of you have been living under a rock lately. Actually, I have to admit I haven't seen the last couple seasons of Survivor (spending all my time blogging), so I'm not even sure if I really know who she is. For all I know she's a really annoying bitch, but I can tell you one thing: she's good in bed. She has a nice body and she clearly enjoys using it. My favorite scene is when her man is lying on his back and she's riding him. I love it when a girl likes to romp around in bed instead of just lying on her back the whole time like a dead fish. I also liked watching her have an orgasm. It sounded real, albeit a little quiet for my tastes. One thing I can't stand about most porn movies is the fake sounds and fake orgasms. I'm surprised there aren't more pornos with actual love-making instead of acting. I mean, if you're gonna fuck on camera, why not have an orgasm too, right?

Anyway, here's a couple links to the Jenna video, courtesy of newsfilter.com: Jenna1 and Jenna2.

Check out this web site for all the latest sex news. They also have a work-safe version.

I love to watch other guys check out my wife. She looks fantastic in a mini-skirt and a tank top. It's fun to go to the grocery store with her and watch the high-school guy behind the deli counter do a double take when she walks past. Especially since she's almost twice his age. But he doesn't know that. To him she looks like a college girl. And sometimes if she's really daring, maybe if we're going out to dinner, she'll wear this one little ribbed white cotton camisole with no bra. It's ever-so-slightly see-through. Just enough so that, if you really look, you can see the darker area of her pink areolas contrasting with the pale white skin of her chest. And the material is soft, thin, and stretchy so that it molds itself to her little breasts, clinging to the outline of her nipples. It's enough to make a grown man go insane, and if she wears it in public I can tell you that she sends plenty of men to the restroom. Including me.

What exactly is up with inflatable party dolls? Some of these things have real, uh, orifices. Do people actually have sex with these things? At a party? And what kind of party? Is it just a bunch of guys at these parties or are there girls there? Has anyone ever been somewhere where these things were in use? And what about party sheep? As if fucking a blow-up plastic girl in front of your friends isn't weird enough, doing it with a plastic sheep has got kinky written all over it.

I'm at work already and it's not even 8:00 yet.

Sadly, there was no action last night. And it wasn't for lack of trying, either. I took a shower and headed up to bed nice and early so that we would have plenty of time to romp around if she so desired. But eventually I guess I fell asleep. The next thing I knew it was midnight and she was still not in bed. I think she was up late cleaning the basement or something. Not that the basement doesn't need a good cleaning, but hey, this is sex we're talking about here. This morning I tried to help her along with a nice naked shoulder, back, and leg rub, but that only succeeded in putting her back to sleep.

So I suppose the spell has been broken...

I'm sure this won't last. In fact, I'm willing to wager a bet. If this streak is still going by Friday I will post a picture of myself nude.

OK, so the last two mornings have been weird. For nealy two years my wife has shown next to no interest in sex and then all of a sudden two days in a row she's become a little sprite. But wait until you year what happened last night. I woke up in the middle of the night to a strange sound that I couldn't quite place. Rubbing my eyes I peered over at the clock. 3:58. Definitely the middle of the night. I lifted my head a little to look around but it was too dark to really see anything. And yet, there was that strange sound. Not wanting get out of bed and wake my wife, I just lay there trying to place the sound. Was one of the kids up? I looked over at the baby monitors, but the lights on the monitors were off, meaning they weren't picking up any sounds form the kid's rooms. As I started to get my bearings it seemed like the sound was coming from over near my wife. A soft, rythmic sound. Hmmm. Interesting. I reached over to touch her leg and realized that her legs were spread, and sliding my hand up her thigh I bumped into her hand which was buried in the folds of her pussy, sawing away. Holy shit! The girl was masturbating! Since when has she done this? And right there next to me in bed, too! OK, now I was fully awake, and like any good husband I decided I had better help out my wife in need. But, wanting to watch her thrill herself a little longer, I decided I wouldn't interrupt her hand quite yet. I felt around to see what nightie she was wearing. It was one of those nighties that buttons all the way down the front with like 20 buttons. It's a short nightie that only goes down far enough to just barely cover her pussy--the kind that gives you a nice teasing peek of her slit and ass when she bends over or reaches up high to get something out of the top shelf in the kitchen. She already had it pulled up to her belly button so I decided to start unbuttonning from the other end. Starting at her neck, one by one I undid each button, pulling it farther apart each time and kissing each newly exposed spot on her chest, down to her tummy. Once the last button was undone I gently pulled each side of her nightie apart, sliding the soft material across her already-hard nipples and exposing them. Still rythmically caressing her pussy, she sighed and faintly began to moan. Leaning close, I licked her nipple and she sucked in a little gasp of air. Then, laying my hand on top of hers I pressed her hand down against her pussy. She started to writhe ever so slightly and pulled her hand out from under mine, leaving me to continue. With her legs spread, her pussy lips were parted just enough for two of my fingers to slip easily down into her warm, moist folds while my palm massaged her mound. Opening my mouth, I placed it over her nipple, biting down very gently with my teeth, and lifted it up an inch or so off her chest. "OH!" she yelped, and raised her hips to grind her twat harder into my hand. Releasing my teeth I gently sucked her nipple for a few seconds and then, leaving it wet and hard I moved down toward her belly-button, kissing her tummy here and there as her moaning and breathing started to become irregular. Then, still rubbing away with my hand, I started to kiss the top of her little patch of pubic hair, and with that she lost it. Every muscle in her body tensed up, she stretched to spread her legs a little more and grind her snatch a little harder into my hand and, letting out a combination of moan and scream, she came, shaking, throwing her arms to her sides and down hard onto the bed, her little fists clenching tightly. Eventually, almost mercifully, after what seemed like minutes, her exctasy began to abate and with one final gasp she collapsed, limp and sweaty, like a rag doll tossed aside by a child. Her only remaining movement was the rise and fall of her chest as she regained her breath. Gently, I continued to caress her pussy, squeezing out the last few tingles of orgasm. So I'm loving my wife's newfound horniness these past few days. I can only wonder if it will continue.

So this morning I woke up and noticed that my wife was half awake, lying on her side, facing the other way, so I scooted over to her side of the bed to put my arm around her and hold her for a little while and we both fell back asleep for a few minutes in the spoon position. Eventually we woke up again and she rolled over on her back, smiled, and said good morning. Remembering yesterday and being a little bold, I suggested she take off her nightie, so she put her arms above her head and I pulled it off for her. Mmmm. I love to see her naked body when she's lying on her back like that. She said she wanted me to hold her a little more, so as she rolled over on her side again, facing away, I snuggled up against her, put my arm around her and cupped her bare breast. I love holding her breast while we cuddle, and I think she likes it too because she always wiggles into whatever position is necessary for me to get my hand around it easily. I like to very gently knead it while she dozes off, feeling the hardness of her nipple against my palm. The problem with this whole naked, cuddling, breast-holding position, however, is that it quickly gets me very aroused. This morning was no exception and within a few minutes my cock was hard up against her ass. And to make matters worse, she had fallen back asleep again. Now what was I gonna do? But I remembered something that Ken had said a couple weeks ago, wondering what would happen if he just whipped it out and started masturbating with his wife next to him in bed. Hmmm. I wondered. I decided to try it. How could I possibly lose, right? One way or another it would have to end in an orgasm. So I pulled my arm back around, lay down on my back, and started yanking away. After a few moments she woke up and turned around to see what was going on. When she saw what was happening she said, "Hey, I'll do that for you." For some strange reason I said, "No, I'm good. I can do it myself." I think it was because I had already psyched myself up to jerk off in front of her and now, dammit, I wanted to finish the job. So she lay down on her back and I reached over and put my other hand on her tummy. When she felt my hand she spread her legs a little, allowing me to slide my hand down and cup her pussy. And with one hand yanking my rod and the other hand caressing her pussy I closed my eyes and proceeded to drift off into fantasy land. But then all of a sudden she sat up again and said, "No. Really. I'll do it." Sigh. "OK," I said, deciding that maybe it wasn't such a good plan to argue when you're wife offers to give you a hand job. So she scooted over next to me, grabbed the lube, and proceeded to lube me up nice and good. Then, naked, sitting indian style, facing me, she flipped her hair back off her shoulders, stuck her chest out, shoulders back, with one hand on the bed to steady herself and the other hand on my cock. Words cannot even describe how hot she looked with her pussy lips slightly parted, her stomach flat, her perky little breasts sticking out at me, her bare shoulders, her slender arms, her hair cascading down her back, a little smile on her face, and her beautiful brown eyes looking at me with a naughty little sparkle. As her hand slid up and down on my greased shaft, I reached up and gently cupped her breast and caressed her shoulder and arm. Within a minute she had me so worked up that I just couldn't take it any longer. Half moaning, half gasping for air, I shot my load out with such force that it hit me in the neck and trickled down onto my pillow. She continued for another minute or so, milking out every last little sensation. Note to self: must masturbate in bed more often.

I can't believe it. I actually got some sex action this morning. I had already gotten up, brushed my teeth, and shaved when I decided that the bed still looked too inviting. Still naked, I climbed back into bed and lay down for one more snooze when, to my surprise, my wife rolled over on her side, facing me, and gave me a goofy little smile. Hmmm, I thought. What could this mean? Now I've pretty much given up trying to make any moves on my wife because I almost always get regected. And rejection hurts. Especially when it happens all the time. So this time I decided I was going to play it very safe. She had on a short, sleeveless nightie and I reached over and started to gently caress her bare thigh. This seemed to meet with some vauge approval so I continued. After a minute or so she rolled over onto her stomach and asked if I would give her a backrub. Not wanting to push things too fast I started to massage her back through her nightie but she stopped me and suggested that it would feel much better if I took it off. So as she propped herself up on her elbows I lifted it up and off over her head and through each arm one at a time. Now she was naked. She lay back down on her stomach and I proceeded with the backrub. I massaged her deep and long, working all the tension places in her back and neck, relaxing her more and more until I noticed that she appeared to be rocking her lower torso gently from side to side. Grinding a little, perhaps? Hmmm. This little girl was starting to get aroused. A good sign, but still plenty of opportunity for the usual rejection. Eventually I finished up the backrub and then turned over and lay down on my back to see what would happen. And wouldn't you know it, she crawled over and climbed on top of me. Now we were getting somewhere. I wrapped my arms around her and she put her arms around my neck, resting her head on my shoulder and we wiggled into position so my penis was parting her pussy lips, up against her clit. We squeezed, wiggled, kissed, and hugged. After a minute or so I moved my hands down below her butt and in between her legs from behind. I can't quite reach her pussy from this position, but I can knead her lower butt and upper thighs in such a way that it seems to stimulate her by opening and closing the folds of her pussy. As I kneaded in and out I started to hear the gentle, wet, squishing sound of a pussy that was getting wet. A little bit more of this, along with my penis continuing to massage her clit, and I could tell that she was ready for some real fun. Nudging her off of me and onto her back I pulled a bottle of lube out of the bedside drawer, poured a generous amount into my hands and rubbed it around, warming it up. Then, hands wet and super-slick, I reached between her legs and lubed up her whole pussy region, her thighs, and her tummy, being especially careful to linger on her clit. Soft, warm, slippery. Her breathing was becoming faster and less rythmic. After a little bit more lube to grease up my balls and penis, I climbed on top of her, and pulled her arms up above her head, pinning her elbows to the pillow. As our greased genitals started to slip around together we looked at each other and smiled because of how good it was starting to feel. Still pinning her elbows, I leaned down to kiss the soft, pale-white skin of her small but firm biceps, moving down to her shoulders, leaving little pecks here and there. Then her collar bone and neck. Kiss, kiss, kiss. Then down the center of her chest.

Meanwhile my cock is now fully erect. Everything down there is super-slippery. She has now parted her legs as far as they will go and is bucking her hips, making sure that her clit is in constant contact with the tip of my cock. Kissing and licking the center of her chest I look to the side and admire her soft little breasts. Her pink nipples are now fully erect and have turned red, creating a beautiful contrast with her white skin. I look up at her face and she looks back at me with lust. Panting, bucking, writhing. The time has come. I lean down and gently brush my lips against one of her nipples. She gasps, knowing what is coming next. Teasing, I kiss around her areola and then open my mouth and lower it down onto her breast, pressing my lips into her softness, wrapping my tounge around her rock-hard nipple, playing with it like a child sucking on a gumball while my cock slides up and down in the folds of her labia, its head flicking her clit with each stroke. And finally she can take it no longer. Haaaa. Ah. Ohhhhhh. Ahhh. Ahhhhhhh. Ahhhhhhhhhhh. Mmmmmmmrrrrrrrrrrrrmmmm. And as her body becomes rigid, shaking and shivering with her orgasm, the sensations overtake me. I yell out and blast her clit with a huge load of my warm fluid, overflowing her slit, drenching her little patch of hair, and filling up her belly-button. She is out of control, making squeaking noises, oblivious to everything except the uncontrollable waves that are pounding through her little body. I watch her for a while, continuing to grind gently against her crotch as I catch my breath. As she finishes I collapse on top of her, squeezing all the warm stickiness between our bodies, and we lie there for several minutes, panting and hugging, squirming a little to squeeze out every last little sensation. And just as our breathing returns to normal and I look her in the eyes and give her a little kiss on the lips we hear a knock on our bedroom door. "Mommy! Daddy! The sun is up! Time to go downstairs!" Whew. We made it just in time.

I heard on the radio yesterday that a new study has revealed that people who have sex two or three times a week tend to look 10-15 years younger than they really are. My wife looks 10-15 years younger than her age, which makes me wonder who's slamming her on the sly. It sure as hell isn't me, as much as I wish it were. Then again, at the risk of tooting my own horn, I think I'm holding up pretty well too in the looks department, despite getting it barely two or three times a year.

Man, that story (see my link from yesterday) really flustered me. Maybe it was the level of detail that made me feel like I was the one taking those pictures. Or maybe it was the long build-up, always wondering how much farther she was going to take him. Maybe it was their young ages. Stories of young love always hit me hard because they remind me of what I didn't have when I was younger. And what, in many ways, I still don't have today. Mostly, though, I think it was just so hard to read about such a beautiful encounter and yet not be able to actually experience it myself at the same time. After reading it I had an amazing orgasm in the restroom at work, but a minute later I was still all wound up. I left work an hour early. I wanted to fuck. I REALLY wanted to fuck. But I realized two things. First of all, the kind of fucking I wanted was a beautiful sexual encounter with a good friend, like in the story--not just a cheap lay. And second, whether I wanted a cheap lay or a beautiful session of lovemaking, I was going to get neither. I masturbated at least three more times before going to bed. God, how I need a girlfriend.

This story has melted me into a puddle of useless goo. I am incapable of doing any more work today, so I'm going home.

One of the days on our vacation we went to a water park. A water park is an interesting place for a guy like me. You see, at the water park, unlike any other place, you have hundreds of very scantily clad women, many of whom are wearing string bikinis that cover less skin than a typical bra and thong, and for long periods of time you are packed in like sardines with these girls waiting in line to get to the top of the water slides and other rides. Lots of almost-naked bodies all around me. Bumping me.  Rubbing up against me.  I look down and all I can see is cleavage.  I was in heaven. Some of my favorite highlights include the following:

The see-through bikini top. There are more of these than you would think. I'm not sure if these girls are kinky or they just don't know that their areolas are visible for everyone to see as soon as they get wet.

The loose bathing suit. Especially on small-breasted girls, when they bend over, the bikini top sometimes droops down allowing a nice complete view of a firm little breast.  When your top is this loose, don't you risk having it ripped off when the water slide dumps you out into the pool at the bottom?  Sadly, I didn't see any girls lose portions of their suits.  Although I have witnessed it at the ocean before.  Ocean waves can be pretty rough at times.  My girlfriend lost her top once in the ocean, and I had my swim-shorts ripped off down to my ankles once by a particularly vicious wave.  But I digress...

The camel toe. Always a favorite. As if the water park isn't already hard-on-inducing enough, a wet, unlined bikini bottom clinging tightly to a shaved pussy is pretty much guaranteed to give me an erection that is impossible to hide. And as with the see-though tops, what is the deal with the unlined bottoms? Do these girls understand what happens when these things get wet?

Of course there's also always a fair share of women who should not be in bathing suits at all, much less bikinis. When your gut protrudes enough that it rolls over and hides your bathing suit bottom, you might want to reconsider whether that tiny string bikini is really the right fashion choice.

I'm back.  I've discovered that a vacation with two toddlers is not exactly relaxing, and definitely not erotic, but we did have a good time nevertheless.  More to come.  I have to get settled back into my posting groove.

From the archives:

If this was true, I would have single-handedly wiped out the entire worldwide cat population by now.

From the archives:

There is a girl I remember fondly. We met at a wedding a few years ago where neither one of us had a date. I would have been there with my wife except that she got called out of town unexpectedly. This girl and I got to talking and found that we had a lot in common. She was having a lot of problems with her husband. After the wedding, we sat on the beach and talked until 3am. Then it was time to go to our separate hotel rooms. What a hard decision to make. We ended up hugging for a long time and saying goodbye. I often think about her and wonder what it would have been like. And I wonder whether we made the right choice by deciding not to stay together that night. And I wonder if she feels the same way.

From the archives:

Taking a cue from There's Something About Mary, I've decided that it's always a good idea to "clean the pipes" before going out in public, even if I'm just going to the grocery store. That way my sexual radar isn't constantly going off in my head like an air-raid siren whenever a pretty girl comes within eyeshot.

While I'm on vacation I have limited access to the Internet and no time to compose posts so I thought perhaps I would republish some old posts from my previous blog. Some of you have read them before so it'll be like watching a summer rerun, but many of you have not. So for the next week or so everything you see here will be old, including today's post about kissing. Enjoy.

Carrie has gotten me all spun up about kissing. I realized that even though I don't get that much sex, I NEVER get ANY kissing. I'm not talking about a peck on the cheek. I'm talking about hot, wet, passionate tounge fucking. My wife is not into kissing at all. If there's saliva to be shared she wants no part in it. I haven't had a good kiss in almost a decade. Yikes! If I could get away with kissing another girl without having it turn into something more serious I would definitely go for it. I could totally justify it without feeling any guilt. Any volunteers?

I'm actually on IM for a change but nobody else is online. Sigh. I never seem to be able to get any trim when I need it.

I'm gonna be away on vacation for the next couple of weeks. I'll be checking email, but probably won't be doing much blogging. I hope everyone has a great holiday and has plenty of hot, sweaty sex. See you later.

Married and looking to meet someone? Here's an interesting website. I'm not sure if it's legit or just another porn site, but at least it looks more legit than a lot of the others. I'm curious, but there's no way I'm going to give them my credit card number. However, they do seem to have an option where you can get a free membership if you post their ad on your own website. I'll have to think about it.

On a different note, this girl at work who looks to be in her early-to-mid-20's is driving me insane and she doesn't even know it. She really turns my crank because she is easily the most beautiful girl in the place and yet she dresses so conservatively. For some reason that combination makes me wild. I want to know if she's really as conservative as she dresses or if she's actually kind of kinky and just hides it well. You'd have to think her looks have netted her plenty of male attention over the years, but she seems to be quite single. She has a degree in aerospace engineering which, I would think, must mean she's pretty bright too. She always has a pretty, genuine smile for me and looks me right in the eye. Always. But I don't get to see her very often because she works on the other side of the building. I think about her and masturbate a lot. In fact I'm doing it right now. I'm sitting at home here in my boxers and my cock is poking right through the hole. Boxers are so convenient. It cracks me up that before I can pretend to do her I have to go through the mental exercise of removing her conservative clothes. But I try to pretend that she's hiding a thong and a shaved pussy under there somewhere. Mmmm. The thought of taking her into the locker room at work, soaping her up in the shower, and giving her a long slow fuck while I hold her wet, slippery body tight against mine is almost too much to bear. Slowly in and out, feeling her pussy squeezing and releasing. My arms around her waist, her arms around my neck. Excuse me for a moment...

OK. I'm back. That was really nice. What a good way to start the morning. Unfortunately, I know she shies away from me because of my wedding ring. She'll make some small-talk and laugh at my jokes, but I can't seem to ever get past that point. I want to figure out some sort of an "in" with her, but what do you do with someone you only see once a week at the water cooler?

I have this pair of white linen pants that are great in the summer. Very lightweight, cool, and breathable. They're especially nice for work since we're not really supposed to wear shorts. But I've noticed that they are kind of see-through. Not a problem since I always wear boxers, but it reminds me of one time when I was at a restaurant in Italy and the waiter was wearing a similar pair of pants with no underwear and you could see everything that was going on in there. Not exactly what you want to see when you're trying to eat a meal. Of course on a girl it would be hot, but on a guy it just seems kind of wrong. Kind of like a plumber's crack. But then again, that's speaking from a guy's perspective. Regardless, I'm wearing the boxers today, as usual. I don't want to give my office-mates any surprises.