Monday, June 28, 2004
I added a link to the No Marriage website although I don't necessarily agree with everything this guy has to say. He is really down on marriage. He blames American women for the high divorce rate and suggests that if you are a man who wants to have a successful marriage you should consider marrying a South American or Russian woman instead. The thing is, I think the American man is just as much to blame for the failure of marriage. In fact, it is our whole society that is to blame. Although maybe "blame" isn't really the right word. The real issue is that marriage as we know it is outdated. It was designed to deal with problems that existed years ago such as a lack of good birth control and the inability for a woman to earn her own money and support herself. But does that mean that marriage is useless nowadays? Hardly. I think marriage is still the best method we have for providing a stable upbringing for our children, including both a male and a female role model. And although I'm still far from becoming a senior citizen, I think that marriage probably provides some important benefits as we get older, including stable support and companionship. Unfortunately the parts of marriage that relate to sex and money are causing much of the divorces we see these days, and this in turn is tearing apart the remaining benefits of marriage. It's especially the sex that is at fault. It simply doesn't make any sense to assume that one person will be able to meet all of your sexual needs for the rest of your life. People need variety. As much as we fear change, we crave it too. Something needs to be done, and marrying a South American woman, while it may solve an individual man's problem, is certainly not going to address the societal problem at large. I don't have many answers, just a big pile of questions. Nonetheless, anyone, male or female, who is contemplating marriage might do well to at least think about the warning on the No Marriage web site.
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